Excerpt. Transcript. The Test Dream, The Sopranos.

1.     Source,WikiPedia.

2.     In the beginning of the dream, he awakens next to the deceased Carmine Lupertazzi who tells Tony how lonely he is on "the other side" and how he misses his wife.

3.     Tony then receives a phone call and is told by the voice that he needs to kill somebody.

4.     Next, Tony is sitting in Dr. Melfi's office, but instead of Dr. Melfi, he is counseled by his deceased ex-comàre Gloria Trillo who talks about their toxic relationship and how she died too young to have children of her own.

5.     She then points to a television set in the corner and says, "Are you ready for what you have to do?" Tony then finds himself riding in the backseat of his father's 1959 Cadillac Eldorado, being driven by his long deceased father Johnny Boy Soprano; also in the car are several deceased characters who have either died by his hand or on his orders, including Big Pussy Bonpensiero, Richie and Mikey Palmice.

6.     When Tony looks at Mikey and tells him he knows he's dreaming, Mikey replies simply, "I got no opinion. One way or the other."

7.     Mikey briefly turns into Artie Bucco who simply looks at Tony and asks, "What?"

8.     When Tony asks where they are going, Pussy, who has now turned into Ralph, turns around and says, "We're driving you to the job," as they pull up to Tony's mansion.

9.     The next segment of his dream involves him waking up at home and getting ready to go to dinner to meet Finn's parents at Nuovo Vesuvio, and Tony distractedly watching clips from several films on the kitchen television.

10. When they finally arrive, Finn's father is actually Detective Vin Makazian, who committed suicide in the first season, but is posing as Finn's father in the dream. Annette Bening, who plays herself, is Finn's mother in the dream.

11. Finn occasionally turns into A.J. during the course of the dinner.

12. Next, Tony's teeth fall out spontaneously. After some symbolic interaction between everyone, Tony and Finn's father go to the restroom.

13. When Tony enters the bathroom stall, he reaches behind the vintage style toilet tank looking for a gun which is not there, an allusion to the The Godfather.

14. Vin then asks Tony, "Are you gonna be able to come through on the thing?" Tony replies, "I did my homework," reaches into his pocket, and takes out a paperback copy of The Valachi Papers.

15. Then, Tony hears shots firing outside and sees Tony B. shooting Phil Leotardo in his car. A bystander shouts, "Why didn't you stop him?"

16. He says he doesn't have a weapon, It suddenly turns into night and Tony begins running from an angry mob, including Annette Bening (who was blatantly identified by Gloria Trillo, now apparently a reporter) and Carmela; some of the mob carrying torches and pitchforks, a la Frankenstein.

17. Tony begins running down a long, dark alley, and Lee Harvey Oswald shoots at him from a third floor window.

18. At the end of the alley an ominous SUV is idling, playing rap music.

19. Suddenly Artie Bucco pops out of a near by door, and he and Tony escape together, again in his fathers old car.

20. Tony looks in the backseat and sees the deceased Richie Aprile and Gigi Cestone, two former Aprile Crew capos who had met their demise shortly after taking control of the "cursed" crew.

21. Tony is then suddenly having wild sex with Artie's wife Charmaine Bucco, who is sucking Tony's thumb and is kinkily dressed in black silk stockings, garters and lingerie while Artie oddly coaches him along; it is another ironic symbol in the dream because she and Tony slept together in real life back in high school while Tony was still dating Carmela.

22. Artie then tells Tony that "she likes it when you rub her muzzle,"

23. After which the dream jumps suddenly to Tony then appearing in his living room mounted on top of Pie-O-My, the ill-fated racehorse that was put to sleep after being severely burnt in the barn fire, and Tony is rubbing her neck. He tells Carmela he wants to move back in.

24. Carmela replies by repeating her response when A.J. asked to move back home: "There are some non-negotiable conditions."

25. In this case, the horse can no longer stay in the house since Tony never cleans up after it, in this case the horse represents his girlfriends and mistresses and how, if he and Carmela reconcile, they can no longer affect her or the family's lives.

26. Several of the characters in his dream eventually make it clear that Tony's job is to kill his cousin to prevent Tony B. from starting a war between Tony's family and Johnny Sack's crew.

27. Tony's last encounter in his dream is at his former high school from the football coach, Coach Molinaro.

28. The coach criticizes Tony, pointing out how Tony had "all the perquisites (sic) to lead young men on to the field of sport" and how he didn't have to be a criminal and live with all the stress the comes from that.

29. When Tony tries to kill Molinaro, his gun malfunctions and the coach continues to taunt him about not being prepared until Tony awakens with a start.

1.     I know you're there, Soprano. Well, come on, you're gonna do it, do it.

2.     Well look at you.

3.     How you doing, Coach Molinaro?

4.     Me, I'm fine. What's that you got there? Bigger dingus [penis] than the one God gave you? You dumb-ass.

5.     You know, you ought to show some respect.

6.     Why?

7.     Because I'm not some kid anymore.

8.     No.

9.     What did I tell you? Cleave yourself away from those bums you hang with, I said.

10. I'm in therapy now.

11. That's a damn shame.

12. You all listened to that piss-mire, Arthur Bucco. He was the worst of the bunch, I told you that.

13. Artie owns a restaurant. He's doing great.

14. Bucco?

15. Yeah.

16. So what? Exception that proves the rule.

17. You know everything, don't you?

18. I suppose you blame it on your father when you cry to that shrink of yours.

19. No, more my mother.

20. Of course. Even better.

21. Well, my family was different from other kid's family.

22. I'll bet that you got that psychologist ["]wrapped around your finger["].

23. That's what you always told me what I was good at, right?

24. I also told you, most likely, you'd ["]take the easy way out["].

25. It hasn't been easy.

26. I see you on TV.

27. Oh, yeah?

28. Some show you put on. Five o'clock news.

29. Then you realise I got nothing to apologise to you for. I am a leader. Got a house worth million and two. Two kids, wife.

30. Do you?

31. Do I what?

32. Have a wife?

33. Yeah. She's got the big house because I'm successful.

34. You and I know your little secret.

35. No. I only told you I wanted to be a coach because I liked to play ball. I was just ["]shining you on["] because that's what I do with people.

36. I told you many times, Anthony, you were special. You had ["]smarts["], personality, leadership potential. All the perquisites to lead young men into sports. Now, look at the stress you live with.

37. You're not prepared. You'll never shut me up.